Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Star Wars: The Last Jedi ★½

There was a moment during this neverending chaos of dull storytelling — probably while watching Finn running on the back of a random creature along with a random new character randomly introduced (whom he had zero chemistry with) in a random subplot, fighting to get from plan A to plan B which, just like EVERY plotline on this, doesn't get anywhere — when I just thought about my future, and I got really stressed out. I started to think that this generation (and probably the next one) is doomed to see this kind of bland and souless films for the rest of their lives. The acquisition of Fox by Disney is close to any post-apocalyptic sci-fi film that portrayed a handful of big companies ruling the world (as if we needed more bizarre post-apocalyptic happenings in the world right now). And what baffles me the most: we're all falling for it, hook, line and sinker. What are these raving reviews for this film?? Really??The world has definitely gone insane.

There's no magic, no mythology here. And zero effort to make it dramatically compelling to create a decent build up, when the script and editing can't even deal with the parallel storylines properly and the film quickly became insufferable and dreadful to sit through over its bloated running time. And no, unlike the previous two films, the over-familiarity is not the main problem here, but the utter MESS the plot and motivations of this story are. Characters change sides whenever is convenient for the action; the new ones are introduced just for the sake of cameo of famous actors (with Benicio Del Toro going full-Jack Sparrow and Laura Dern, one of the better actresses of our generation, is relegated to an embarrassing and outrageously useless character) while the old ones don’t have anything for us to cling to.

Rey, the main character, ONCE AGAIN DOESN’T HAVE AN ARC. Where’s the Hero’s Journey, from where all this began?? Joseph Campbell must be facepalming in his grave. When we all complained that Rey already knowing how to deal with the Force in the first film was a big problem (while Luke took three films and one hand to learn it), everybody said: “don’t worry, in the next one they’ll explain everything and it will make it worth!”. So there you go, there was absolutely nothing to justify it, it was just a loose, poorly-written script that can’t even build a compelling protagonist arc and seems to be unaware of the hero’s journey and why it matters. I understand where they're going for, that "anyone can feel the Force". I'm ok with that, but BUILD a fucking plot for that, for god's sake! That final moment when Rey uses the force to help the Rebels would be MUCH stronger if she were using it for the first time, right? But no, we already saw her using a bunch of times on this and on the previous when it happens, there's zero impact. So what’s the point? What does she have to grow to or to learn? And worst, WHY SHOULD I CARE ABOUT THIS WHOLE THING? (especially considering Kylo Ren, who should be the main baddie and threat on these new films, is the most incompetent and boring villain of all time and we end the film without a clear vision of what he really wants!).

It’s a shame for Campbell’s legacy and especially George Lucas’ (I always say the prequels, bad as they were, at least had a clear creative vision and narrative coherence. For this alone, they deserve much more praise than this awful mess). I mean, even Rey’s training with Luke, the main anticipation of this film, it's SO frustrating. After all, she just gives up halfway through and HE is the one who learns a lesson. LOL!
We end up SO confused of what was it all about. The writers seems to have no idea what to tell or where to go, what matters is to introduce eye-popping visuals and random characters to sell toys.

Guys, I understand the willing to LOVE something these days. These are desperate times, we’re confused, the news are depressing, the world is fucked up and all. I get it. But stop praising this corny piece of really, REALLY bad storytelling. I don't mind blockbusters like Marvel, that are generic or just more of the same, the problem are the ones like this, that just fail in the most basic sense: To entertain.

Make no mistake, this franchise is doomed to suck until the end. Don’t count on me on the next one. And may the force of good films be with us in the next decades.

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