Midsommar ★★★★½

This was by far the most somber screening I've attended yet, where the audience barely laughed at all and was also incredibly silent. That made for quite a different atmosphere than my previous viewings, and even though there isn't any tension left for me, I was just as enthralled by the story as I had been the first time. It really is stunning to me that I haven't even begun to get bored with this film and am *still* noticing additional details/making new connections (seeing this many showings so close together has definitely helped). I still get so sucked into the world of this film, and there's nothing like experiencing it with a room full of people. The guy next to me literally sat on the edge of his seat for almost the entire movie, and I don't think I've ever witnessed that before at any film.

This is not a perfect film (and even though I love it this much, I'm still not inclined to give it the full 5 stars), and I know that most people think I'm crazy for having seen it this many times, but this has been the exact film I needed in this season of my life. I am often able to find spiritual meaning in certain movies, where the theme, character development, or some other element echoes something I'm dealing with or can deeply relate to, and that is definitely the case here. Film is generally not "entertainment" to me, but a lens through which I filter my own experiences and find a new way of seeing, or a mirror reflecting parts of my self back to me, both of which are essential and give me crucial insights. It can be hard to explain to other people, which is why I often just shrug when someone asks me why a film has affected me so deeply, as this one has. Sometimes words are not sufficient.

Sadly, this is already leaving most of the theatres in my area, and my showing was almost sold out (all but the front row), so it seems premature. I'm really going to miss being able to watch it whenever I'm in the mood (which, honestly, is pretty much any time I'm awake), and ideally I'd like to see it one more time on the big screen. If I don't manage to see it again, then it's been a good run and I'll be happy with what I've had. This film is a part of my story now.

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