Cube 2: Hypercube

Cube 2: Hypercube ★½

Hooptober 7.0 - #3

My first favorite good-bad movie, it could be argued that Cube 2: Hypercube jump-started a paracinematic hobby of mine that has wasted me many an hour. I could, in some respects, blame Cube 2: Hypercube for why I've seen more New French Extremity films than French New Wave films, more Neil Breen films than Jean Renoir films, more films in the Psychotronic Video Guide than films in the Criterion Collection.

OK, that may be extreme (and I don't know if that last one is actually true). Hyperbole may be the defining tone of my Hooptober this year. Halloween, Friday the 13th, and Dawn of the Dead, among plenty others, did much more to influence my tendency toward paracinematic genre films than Cube 2: Hypercube. But Cube 2: Hypercube was one of the first films to teach me that (1) movies can be very, very bad and still exist in the world, as opposed to being destroyed forever so no eyes can be pained by them, and (2) it is possible to enjoy a movie that satisfies condition 1.

The sad thing is, in retrospect, Cube 2: Hypercube is not even a good-bad movie. It is simply bad (mediocre if I'm being uncharacteristically generous). It manages to look worse than its predecessor, despite being made years later and having a substantially larger budget. The attempt at mythology building which comes with the territory of a sequel is atrocious (that ending is...woof). And the clear inadequacy of these screenwriters to write characters is frustrating to put it lightly (I am convinced the writers who crafted the line "I'm blind, Kate. I'm a burden" have never encountered a blind person in their lives).

Deflated as I may be by the realization that Cube 2: Hypercube does not live up to the good-bad label I once attributed to it, I will always have the fond memory of laughing uncontrollably, as an impressionable young person, at the sight of two people having sex while suspended in midair as time rapidly propels forward to the point where they become nothing but bones.

Cube 2: Hypercube is a five-star movie title given to a one-star film. The fact that the naming convention of _____ 2: Hyper_____ never caught on is a travesty.

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