I have the 3D glasses, but I hear it doesn’t look that great, so I’m just gonna go 2D this time. Excited to finally see Jason in the mask. 
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Wow, the song from the title sequence is way funkier than I would have imagined for Friday the 13th. Pretty cool, though!
So far, both sequels have started out by replaying the end of the previous film. I personally think that was a great idea, especially since home video barely existed back then. You might have missed the first two entirely. 

BREAKING NEWS: I just googled “Jason Voorhees kill count”. It’s 157! That’s a lot, but not entirely unheard of. There’s a few serial killers that claim 200 deaths. Samuel Little boasts 100, and Harold Shipman has at least 218 confirmed. 

Ok, a guy started eating fish food, they got my attention back. 
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Wow, all of our female protagonists look the same!
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Oh, I just noticed a cool shot. There’s an obligatory smoking-weed-in-a-van scene, and one of the girls hands someone a joint. But it’s a POV shot, so it looks like she’s handing us- the audience- a joint! It’s cool in 2D, but this was obviously meant for the 3D effect, which would be even cooler. I just that was amusing. 
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“Did I do something wrong?”
Yeah, you fucking emerged from the shadows like a murderer and grabbed her neck! While there’s a killer on the loose. Then you made it clear that you only want sex, and dropped her off a barn! You fuck!
By the way, this movie is clearly goofier than the first two. Like the gang at the convenience store. That was weird and hilarious. EDIT: uh oh, the gang is back!
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Have I seen this before?
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I like the cast. All the Friday films, at least so far, follow a group of... teenagers? How old are they supposed to be? They all look 30. Anyway, a group of young, attractive people hang out at Camp Crystal Lake, and are inevitably picked off one by one by Jason and/or his mom. That’s the great thing about this series, though. We have time to hang out and get to know these people a bit, as they goof around and joke with each other. And have sex occasionally. 
I especially liked the Shelly character, played by Larry Zerner. Unfortunately, it seems like he barely worked again. 
One thing, though. They keep talking about past events, like, are we supposed to know these characters? What’s with all these references to things we know nothing about? Or am I missing something?
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How many jumpscare fakeouts can there be? Isn’t there a law? 
And why is the water so brown and murky?
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Our Final Girl was likeable, and occasionally badass, but we don’t explore her personality all that much. She kind of just became the Final Girl out of nowhere. 
This was an incredibly simple story, even simpler than the first two, if that’s possible. It feels like the most basic Friday the 13th story you could tell. And it works. 
Let’s see how long they have the guts to keep it at the lake. I have a feeling they’re gonna try to bring it to the city soon. It can’t be long before Jason takes Manhattan. 

NOTE: So have all the Friday movies had the same ending so far, or just two?