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  • Forrest Gump

    Forrest Gump

    ★★½

    C'mon dude, we're going to throw rocks at the mentally challenged kid!

  • Batman Forever

    Batman Forever

    ★★

    Took my 8 year old to see this and he's suicidal now

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  • Batman Returns

    Batman Returns

    ★★★½

    Took my 8 year old to see this movie and now the family cat's been dicked down so hard that it may as well have 3 legs. He also keeps strapping bombs on it and sending it at the juggalo parade that keeps standing outside our house ever since I started my anti clown crusade on 4chan. Great film, and I can't believe that it cured gender inequality.

  • The Fantastic Four

    The Fantastic Four

    My ideal cast for this movie:
    Mr. Fantastic: Miles Teller
    Invisible Woman: Kate Mara
    The Human Torch: Michael B. Jordan
    The Thing: Jamie Bell
    Director: Josh Trank

    Can't Wait!