Suspiria ★★★½

I maintain that if you're going to remake a classic that's a classic due to its incredible style, the best way to do so is to give your remake a completely new, equally incredible style -- which is exactly what Guadagnino does here. Somewhat perversely, the style he's chosen is a sort of '70s Euro-art-horror thing, just a completely different corner of '70s Euro-art-horror than the one Argento was working in.

On a craft level, this thing is off the charts. It's hard to single out one standout category, but if I had to pick, it would be the editing, which turns the film's dance sequences into the Satanic version of All That Jazz.

And while it's not really an actor-driven film, the performances are also very strong, with Swinton excelling in another dual role, Johnson fully committing to another tough-yet-vulnerable type, and Goth nearly stealing the movie as the stealth lead for much of its runtime.

And yet -- I was kind of mixed on the film overall. It's punishingly long, for one, and frequently laughably pretentious, for another. I couldn't help but feel at times like I was watching the work of an arthouse director looking down his nose at genre, and trying to gussy up a simple pulp story with all sorts of heavy-handed attempts at relevance and meaning -- nearly all of which are too obvious or too obtuse to land with much power.

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