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  • Beavis and Butt-Head Do America

    Beavis and Butt-Head Do America

    ★★★★½

    "I want to introduce you to these nice young men, Travis and Bob"

  • Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    "we need to give the characters a good motivation to set the dinosaurs loose to setup a sequel... How do we go about that?"

    "Could we make the little girl a clone so she sympathizes with the dinosaurs, since they were all created in a lab?"

  • Captain Marvel

    Captain Marvel

    ★★★½

    Movies-only fans of Marvel will finally know what it was like reading comics when Bendis was taking the lead on Avengers and there was the constant question of "is x a Skrull?" looming over everything.

  • Shazam!

    Shazam!

    ★★★★

    I forgot how weird the Marvel Family lore is until I watched this. I mean, the comics feature a talking tiger in a suit and a mad scientist becoming obsessed with ~murdering children~. So, I hope this movie does well because in addition to it being great, I want to see more of that.

    As a note on a "real nerd shit" level, I also feel like a lot of the actors were given exaggerated teeth and/or jawlines to make them look like humans who were drawn by Gary Frank.

  • Fighting with My Family

    Fighting with My Family

    ★★★

    "some say Paige started the Divas Revolution"

  • Blue Collar

    Blue Collar

    ★★★★½

    Pryor's performance is fiery as hell.

  • Leave No Trace

    Leave No Trace

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I'm really happy neither of the main characters died from getting stung by what I assumed would be Chekov's Bee Hive.

  • Hot to Trot

    Hot to Trot

    ★★★

    We as a society take for granted the fact a movie exists featuring John Candy voicing a stock-savvy talking horse.

  • Streets of Fire

    Streets of Fire

    ★★★★

    The first half of this movie would have been a killer TV pilot.

  • Coogan's Bluff

    Coogan's Bluff

    ★★

    Coogan is kind of a dick, and also sort of a shitty cop! This film has a great bar brawl and a motorcycle chase in the last half hour, but definitely a case where some of the parts are better than the whole.

  • Deathrow Gameshow

    Deathrow Gameshow

    Kind of a Diet Troma piece of schlock cinema. While it seems like it's setting itself up to introduce a lot of shock and awe at the beginning, the middle mostly dwindles with some bad comedy and lame gags. I see some other people on here have written nicer reviews of this, but it got quite as weird as gross and nothing else stood well on its own for me.

  • Glass

    Glass

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I was actually fully on board with this in spite of a ton of hokey garbage from Sarah Paulson's character, but the fate of David Dunn was just trash - and felt a little mean-spirited! It ultimately makes sense, I guess, with the setup we're left with at the end but, man, that left a bad taste in my mouth.