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  • Conan the Barbarian

    Conan the Barbarian

    ★★★★½

    Both flesh and steel may be strong but they are inconsequential in and of themselves.

    But will can be indestructible. The will not to allow oneself to be bullied, broken, or defeated. The will to endure. It is will that makes steel strong and by extension the flesh that wields it.

    The production design, casting, and music here are superb. Not an accurate depiction of its source material but a damn good film with honorable intent, and a dreamy mood…

  • Batman Returns

    Batman Returns

    ★★★★★

    "Must you be the only lonely man-beast in town?"

    A film about being unable to overcome trauma. Dares to drift from its source material and divide its audience to tell a compelling story. Batman doesn't get an arc, but is rather a doomed voyeuristic dictator. Keaton is effortless, playing Batman not as persona. Michelle Pfeiffer is on another plane. Burton's sincerity in everything is palpable. One of the most visually rich and tactile films I've ever seen. Seamless visual effects.…

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  • Magnolia

    Magnolia

    ★★★★★

    "Flower Power"

    A Big Titted Analysis

    Everyone loved Paul Thomas Anderson’s melodramatic opera, “Magnolia”, back in 1999, except Kevin Smith (but fuck that guy because he hasn’t made a good film since “Dogma” as far as I know - I haven’t seen “Red State”, so maybe I shouldn’t say that but still fuck him because he has a different opinion than mine). Everyone who does enjoy 'Magnolia' has sited the acting, the music, and the Altmanesquenessness in it. Some of…

  • Ri¢hie Ri¢h

    Ri¢hie Ri¢h

    ★★★★½

    Nostalgia is a reasonable factor when rating films fuck you