Skyfall

Skyfall ★★★½

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This review may contain spoilers.

Bond gets a woman killed who he DIDN'T have sex with.

My favorite part about this movie, and the one that really sums it all up, is when M has to testify before some committee about MI-6's various fuck ups and owns the bitch politician grilling her by reading a Tennyson poem about how "We are not now that strength which in old days, Moved earth and heaven" and that England is "made weak by time and fate, but strong in will. To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield" right before Javier Bardem's loopy, queer ex-agent bursts into the hearing and kills a bunch of people. Bond, of course saves her, but then she gets capped and dies anyway. Bye bye honey! Not even Bond can save this shitty country!

There's a lot of sonorous clap trap in this one, but it's got some fire action scenes, like when he teams up with Albert Finney to kill all those guys with booby traps in Bond's old house in Scotland. Plus you got Roger Deakins as DP, which is basically a cheat code for otherwise mediocre directors. Best of all is Bardem who absolutely annihilates as the villain, Silva, truly putting to shame Christoph Waltz's phoned-in Blofeld in 'Spectre.'

The best Bond villains have to be just slightly cooler than Bond is to be a compelling adversary, and Silva has swag for days. I love the monologue he does where compares being an intelligence agent to rats trapped in oil drum eating each other. Plus, this film establishes as canon that Bond has done gay for pay for Queen and Country. And when you've got a surrogate mother like Judi Dench, could it be any other way?