A Quiet Place Part II

A Quiet Place Part II ½

three things i pondered while watching this awful sequel to a film that i also hated:

1) emily blunt is too good of an actress to be shackled to her husband's neoconservative patriarchal horror series.

2) why would i watch a shithead like john krasinski poorly rip-off spielberg for 97 minutes when i can, y'know, just watch spielberg instead?

3) would it kill them to do something cool with the evil monsters here outside of having them scream and then throw people around off-camera? like, if you're gonna rip-off spielberg, at least do what he does and really provide a showcase for the creatures. it's so obvious that krasinski is trying to make a whole franchise out of that kitchen scene from jurassic park, but in there, at least the velociraptors were COOL and had personality to them. the sound-sensitive aliens here get nothing interesting to do, no set-up, no sequence really, they just emerge out of nowhere and exist for jumpscares, and krasinski obviously thinks he's beyond that sort of thing, but no, you're not, fuck you. show me the damn monsters doing something cool, that's what these movies exist for, no one cares about some belabored notions of grief or trauma wrapped in this survivalist clap-trap, show me some cool shit or get the fuck out.

anyway, this sucks and i deeply dread the inevitable third entry.

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