Eternals

Eternals ½

kevin feige, 2008: "nobody really knows iron man, maybe we could make a decent movie with this guy?"

kevin feige, 2021: "eugh, time to make another one of these things. ideas? uhhh... how about 'gay gnostic android super-scientist drops nukes on hiroshima'? not enough? oh, i got it, 'marvel's first sex scene'! there we go! make sure the male actors take enough steroids for us to hide underneath the CGI, and get the latest indie darling to direct it. now if you'll excuse me, i have to find a better way of disposing with my piles of money than just throwing it into the fireplace."

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