Deadpool 2 ★½

i only watched this because the ocean’s 8 showing was sold out and i was with friends who did not entertain my suggestion of seeing book club to indulge in old white women shenanigans. also somebody stole the cardboard cutout of rihanna. like they literally just ripped her out and i just want to know where she is, if she found a good home, if she’s being well fed, etc.
every single joke in this movie has definitely been told by a middle school boy in 2009 and i AM speaking from personal experience as i was friends with those middle school boys in 2009! except it is all made infinitely worse bc the jokes were written by a bunch of 40 year old men and are being spoken by the soggy bread roll vessel that is ryan reynolds. i have never watched something that tried so hard to 1. create the joke and then 2. be IN on the joke! and i watched 5 whole seasons of glee! it’s like “haha fuck this movie, right?” and then continues with the movie without challenging anything but still expects us to care. it’s literally too tongue in cheek to be any fun. it is trying so hard to be self-aware that it isn’t at all. this is why straight people can’t write or perform camp. 
here is my separate review for the 15 minutes of the 3 female characters in this movie that didn’t immediately die for male character progression (domino and the teenage gays):
fucking superb you funky little lesbians

adison liked this review