Spring Breakers ½

I just... I just don't see how Spring Breakers works on any level.

As a straight up piece of entertainment, it's full of undeveloped, one-note or one-joke performances from all involved, whether it's the interchangeable blondes, conflicted church girl or Franco's 2nd rate 2013 update of Drexl, going through a series of repetitive events where our characters aren't doing anything at the end that they weren't at the beginning, leaving me to never care about anyone or anything on screen.

As a piece of satire, to which Korine has brushed aside saying "I just want you to have a physical experience", painting these type of people as the moronic, debaucherous, worst of America.. or using it as some general statement of youth rage in a mindless world, the point is made within minutes, and then you're stuck with something that just isn't entertaining for 90 more. The long stretches of just straight up partying and ass shaking don't add anything to the point and thus become mindless filler, like you just sad through every reality show transition shot ever edited back to back. And making such a point is as easy as making a documentary about water being wet. I mean, The Real Cancun play better as satire, and by accident.

I just don't know what I was supposed to get out of this thing. Most of the dialogue essentially, like Bellflower, never rises above "shit fuck dude" and is thus to me just a bunch of obnoxious forgettable noise. Some of the scenes have touches of visuals I would like in a Soderbergh film, but most of the time the way Korine shoots and uses color reminds of music videos from 1998-2000 when every single pop song was about summertime. There is enough neon in this film to fill three more Schumacher Batman movies. None of the situations play as particularly shocking or raunchy for me to consider some provocative experience. The scenes of Britney Spears play as a try-hard wtf moment that make me feel the film would have been better served to dive right in, American Psycho style, with an ironic soundtrack instead of the Martinez/Skrillex "wub wub" crap that pollutes every scene.

Generally, each scene doesn't even feel like it was written any more than minutes before shooting, never bothered with anything resembling effort, and reeks of "We'll make it art in post" via filters, editing and soundtrack choices that on the other hand, try too hard. What results for me is a empty bag of garbage masquerading as trashy art.

Korine wants me to have some visceral experience, but the only thing I experienced was the feeling that I wasted my time. The only thing I'll remember about it in a few days is that it was weird that Jeff Jarrett was leading a youth group.

If you want to watch dumb spring breakers cavort in a manner that is both dumb, raunchy, fun, and just a tad satirical, I'd point you over to Piranha 3D instead.

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