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  • Climax

    Climax

    ★★★★½

    ...All right, Noé, ya pervy French bastard, you won me over. Climax is his most restrained feature so far, and thank God for that, because I don’t think this material could’ve been stretched out longer (and arguably even now it could’ve used just a little trimming). The cast dances their asses off, the camera movements are incredible, and the soundtrack slaps. It’s a nightmare from Hell that I’m not going to forget anytime soon. A reminder to you all: never drink LSD-laced sangria.

  • Birds of Passage

    Birds of Passage

    ★★★★½

    Birds of Passage trades in the small scale and jungle environment of the directors’ last film, Embrace of the Serpent, and instead widens its scope to a historical gangster epic set in the desert. Yet despite the broad strokes in the story, it’s an intimate depiction of the fallout from capitalism and greed. Traditions are ignored, lives are destroyed, and ethnic groups are exploited. Masterful and searing, packed with a great cast, especially Carmina Martíñez.

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  • Cabaret

    Cabaret

    ★★★★★

    Can you believe The Godfather won Best Picture over this masterpiece? Highway robbery.

  • Captive State

    Captive State

    ★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Captive State begins with the best scene in the film, as a distressed police officer and his wife try to flee a locked down Chicago. They drive recklessly, knocking over cones and fences, and almost escape, before they're stopped in a tunnel. There's...something unnatural at the other end. Just before they can turn around, they die by exploding into puffs of red smoke, right in front of their children. Aliens crawl over the car, and all the older brother Rafe…

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  • The House That Jack Built

    The House That Jack Built

    Lars Von Trier: Hey man, doesn’t life suuuuck? And doesn’t the life of an artist suuuuck? Aren’t serial killers the same as serious artists? Aren’t their victims, in a sense, a work of art? Hey, aren’t I a serious artist? Isn’t my entire filmography full of violent and disgusting things? Doesn’t Matt Dillon in this movie I directed remind you of me? Doesn’t his appalling crimes in this movie remind you of my movies and how they’re received by audiences?…

  • Serenity

    Serenity

    Tell Life Itself, Book of Henry, and Collateral Beauty to move over, because the new king of the “What the Fuck” Movie category has arrived. Serenity is a truly incompetent mess. It barely even feels like a film, and more like a fever dream inside Tommy Wiseau’s mind. Honestly, I enjoyed how screwed up it was. Laughable at points and jaw-dropping at others, this contains a boatload of memorably terrible moments.