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  • Bohemian Rhapsody

    Bohemian Rhapsody

    ★½

    BEST EDITING ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!?!

  • Paul Blart: Mall Cop

    Paul Blart: Mall Cop

    I could give into the meme and give this movie a glowing, positive, 5/5 review for the movie and joke on how it is secretly an art film, only in the vein hope that this will get all the likes on Letterboxd when really it will be buried in comments where so many sad pathetic people will be doing the same.

    So here is my profound comment instead. Kevin James looks cute in a mustache, and I hate that I had to think that.

    Fuck you Kevin James!

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  • 1941

    1941

    ★★

    I got the DVD a while back for like $5, which was a steal IMO. However what I didn’t realize is that the movie is presented in a 4:3 ratio, in other words full screen. Which wouldn’t be a big deal, but the movie is still letterboxed like it is a wide screen presentation. Meaning I had to sit through two and a half hours of watching this movie in a tiny rectangle!!! God bless!

    Anyways, Spielberg’s worst film by…

  • Pain & Gain

    Pain & Gain

    ★★★

    This movie has two cast members of the Suite Life of Zack and Cody! Count ‘em! Two! TWO!!!

    This is probably the best Michael Bay movie ever made, which isn’t saying much, but I’ll take this over the homogenized slog of the Transformers movies he made or the aggressively boring Pearl Harbor and Armageddon any day of the week. His excessive, maximal style is put to great use here as the over saturated machismo fits well with the ugly, cocaine-fueled…

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  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    ½

    Not once did anyone declare “Pizza Time!” Worst Spider-Man movie ever!

  • Swiped

    Swiped

    ½

    Shoutout to my boi Eric for watching this with me! Best $20 I ever spent!