• Home Sweet Home Alone

    Home Sweet Home Alone

    Well- umm yea, this ain’t it.
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    Home Sweet Home Alone is objectively garbage. It’s a comedy that only got two minor chuckles out of me ((a German speaking “HomeBot” joke and I forgot what the other was)). You shouldn’t be making 6 movies about the same premise, it’s an awful idea that leads to awful creations just like this. This is an insult to Home Alone honestly and I can’t believe that it was green lit in the first…

  • Ghostbusters: Afterlife

    Ghostbusters: Afterlife

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    [SPOILERS]
    holy shit. Paul Rudd is our Rick Moranis!
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    So I saw Ghostbusters: Afterlife in a crowded theater and I must say, it’s a hell of a film to watch with others that I kinda needed. I needed this boost of serotonin in my life, and this laughter filling a room to the point where I just felt like my life was actually starting to reach… normalcy. It’s just so sweet to see such a great audience ((besides…

  • ThanksKilling 3

    ThanksKilling 3

    what the fuck.
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    ThanksKilling 3 is one of, if not the most annoying piles of shit I’ve ever seen. Goddamnit, it’s bad. I have wasted 2 and a half hours of my life with last night and this morning watching these two… things. Not a singular thing was funny, it’s just pure obnoxiousness throughout with no meaning behind anything but to annoy the hell out of a person. No excessive weirdness or gore could save this dreadful experience…

  • ThanksKilling

    ThanksKilling

    i was hoping id never see myself watching this shitshow, but here we are.
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    as expected, it was abysmal in practically every category except for the gore not being… that bad i guess? i only watched it because i heard a whole lot of shit about it and james a. janisse made a video about its sequel which ill be watching tomorrow. this was my last resort for a thanksgiving movie though as there was really nothing else that…

  • Planes, Trains and Automobiles

    Planes, Trains and Automobiles

    ★★★★½

    I relate to no one more than I do John Candy in this movie, holy shit.
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    It’s still as good as last years viewing, though that may me due to me watching w/ all my friends and shit like that. There’s just something so nice about having apple pie the second you get into class and then watching Candy and Martin deliver in some of the most underrated chemistry within the film industry. Sure, not everything’s as funny…

  • The Den

    The Den

    ★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    This is why I don’t use anything like Omegle.
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    So I watched The Den and I must say, it’s only good once that third act comes around. That finale is absolutely brutal when it comes to the direction that we went with it. I had so much goddamn hope just for it to be thrown down the drain, yet it still worked. This is a very disturbing piece of found footage cinema that’s not for the faint of…

  • Candyman

    Candyman

    ★★★★½

    Candyman. Candyman. Candyman. Candyman. Candyman.
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    I need to rewatch the originals before these re-sequels or whatever they are. Hey, at least I can remember the majority of what happened in the previous film though so that’s good. So I just watched the new Candyman film and it was brilliant. This is a unique, yet welcoming new take on the slasher genre as it holds some brutally fantastic cinematography throughout alongside characters who you can sympathize for due to…

  • Free Guy

    Free Guy

    ★★★★

    Don’t have a good day. Have a great day!
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    I unironically enjoyed the utter hell out of this honestly. Free Guy has pop culture jokes around every… foot, yet the majority of them actually worked? Holy shit! And yeah, some jokes just didn’t land, causing them to feel unnecessary and awkward here and there, but what worked was actually pretty damn surprising. The performances aren’t the greatest, but would you really expect anything fantastic for a film like this?…

  • Witch Hunt

    Witch Hunt

    This spoiled Thelma & Louise for me dude, what the fuck was that for?
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    I doubt I’ll remember a singular thing about this in a few days from now. Witch Hunt is this year’s The Craft: Legacy making for 2 dull, teenage-based, witch flicks in just two years. This one holds horrible effects, mid performances from everyone, and a plot that I couldn’t give the tiniest of shits about. There’s nothing really intriguing about it, it just… exists really. I could…

  • The Suicide Squad

    The Suicide Squad

    ★★★★★

    this city is not yours. this city is not ours. this city is theirs!!!
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    Goddamn, this is an astonishingly well-made film. I truly cannot put it into words how much I absolutely love it. It’s a godly film of heart, humor, and pain throughout. Damn, it’s just so, so good and I must say: while my opinion hasn’t changed too much, I think it’s a little bit better ((especially when your able to notice more details and admire…

  • Ghostland

    Ghostland

    ★★★½

    WHAT IN THE FUCK?!?
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    I only watched this b/c The Suicide Squad on Vudu wasn’t loading halfway through and we had to find something else. Incident of a Ghostland is a brutal, yet fantastically tense horror filled to the brim with intensity around every corner. It’s pretty well-written too as it holds onto a good twist, though that goodness is decreased a bit as a result of the film revealing this twist too early on in the story…

  • Jungle Cruise

    Jungle Cruise

    ★★★

    Is it just me or did this feel really slow?
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    So I decided to watch Jungle Cruise. It’s not bad, but it’s also not that great either. This is simply in the middle for me as, while not bringing anything new to the adventure genre, it still delivers in a fun Dwayne Johnson doing Dwayne Johnson things kind of way where my mind shuts down, but my serotonin awakens. Jaume Collet-Serra gives off some fine direction though his…