time also makes me scared and i always feel like everything is moving way too fast and i don’t want to get older and i am afraid i will be ugly and lose my mind and get sick and see people i love die and i also feel like there are many memories that i will never be allowed to have and i also want to be connected to something bigger and i forgot the words that translate how i feel but the waves keep crashing and washing away and maybe this beach isn’t so bad and there is so much beauty and i wish i could hear her voice singing once again when she gets older and i wish i could be forgiven and be able to forgive and live and let time be the king and maybe instead of fighting everything i could touch the sand with my bare hands and make castles with someone i will love until the day i die