• Zack Snyder's Justice League

    Zack Snyder's Justice League

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    A flag planted on a barren world.

    I want to start off by saying that I have nothing personal against Zack Snyder. As far as I can tell, he is the real deal: an auteur without an ego, a genuinely nice person, an artist who cares for everyone who works under him. That's a rare thing in the film business, and it's something everyone should be happy about.

    I also have nothing but sympathy for him and his family in…

  • The Gentlemen

    The Gentlemen

    This is the only good movie Guy Ritchie has ever made. Punchy and efficient in a way his work has never been. Could stand to be a lot less racist. Michelle Dockery is hot.

  • Ronin

    Ronin

    This was one of my dad's favourite movies. Whenever it was on TV, he'd always stop whatever he was doing and watch it. Probably seen bits and pieces of this a dozen times over my life. Two hours of dudes rocking, getting into gun fights and car chases. He loved it every time.

    I miss him.

  • Run

    Run

    Great movie. Unpopular opinion apparently but I connected more with this than Searching, which I was already a big fan of. I said at the time that Aneesh Chaganty would be a director to watch, and what do you know? I didn't lie!

    Apparently the Letterboxd crowd is lukewarm on this one. I've seen a lot of reactions that could be summed up as "it's a standard sophomore outing." Although Searching is more visibly proficient and innovative at first glance,…

  • Dragged Across Concrete

    Dragged Across Concrete

    I have no idea why this was my first movie of 2021 but here we are

    Let's call myself a Zahler novice. I should probably rewatch Bone Tomahawk at some point; I did see it once years ago and remember it mostly as "fine." Apparently it's one of the most gruesome movies a lot of people on here have ever seen but I don't recall being as put off by the gore as everyone else. Granted, this also happened to…

  • There Will Be Blood

    There Will Be Blood

    The title refers to what will happen to me when Film Twitter finds this review

  • I'm Thinking of Ending Things

    I'm Thinking of Ending Things

    Absolute claptrap. Two hours and fifteen minutes of contempt for art, culture and humanity at large distilled into indie darling "surreal psychological thriller as metaphorical trauma portrait" checklist soup. I seriously considered giving this a one star if not for Jessie Buckley single-handedly trying her damnedest to keep it above water. Another one of those movies that thinks it's skewering its male lead to make A Point™ about how the female lead is treated when everything in its structure and…

  • Noah

    Noah

    First half of this is brilliant. From the beginning all the way to the flood, I was completely enraptured by the world Aronofsky created, a place that feels biblical in every meaning of the word. Based on scripture, yes, but also grand and majestic in ways that evoke Peter Jackson and Gareth Edwards, a massive canvas upon which stories of a scale we can only barely come to fathom unravel before our eyes. I loved the Watchers, the stark portrayal…

  • Drag Me to Hell

    Drag Me to Hell

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    If I was cursed to burn for all eternity I would simply double check to make sure I had the correct envelope before passing it on. RIP to Christine but I'm different

  • Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

    Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Climax: The Movie™

    This is going to take a while, and yes, you absolutely can take that as a joke about the running time. Overall I like this movie but there's some things we need to talk about

    1) Jack Sparrow

    Jack Sparrow does not work when he doesn't have other characters to bounce off of. This is the mistake 4 and 5 made; as a solo lead, he's just chaotic antics with no anchor. This is why the Sparrow-Will-Elizabeth…

  • Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

    Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

    Fuck it, this rules

    Great sequel that builds on everything from its predecessor and actually dares to evolve rather than spin in place. Not content to replicate previous success, Dead Man's Chest goes bolder and digs deeper to put its cast of characters through genuine challenges. Where the world in the first one felt neat and tidy and at least somewhat tethered to our reality, here it spills its guts out and expands the elements of macabre fantasy and a…

  • Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

    Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

    ★★★★★

    This movie is a miracle. Every single revisit over the years has me still in shock that a theme park ride was adapted into one of the all-time great adventure films. A genuinely great screenplay that deftly balances stakes, emotion, humour, characters and world-building. Plot mechanics are very much on the surface but it works because watching every cog in the machine lock into place is an endlessly satisfying collection of set-ups and payoffs. They absolutely should teach this script…