• Diary of a Wimpy Kid

    Diary of a Wimpy Kid

    ★★★

    definitely not, like, bad or anything; I was gonna be merciful considering my fondness for the books and those first two live action movies (it's also merciful in turn by only being an hour long) but a new 3D animated movie gives a good excuse to reboot it a little. and I think it works, mostly! not that I can necessarily remember all the details of the first book or anything but the deviations here are definitely not-the-best, but the…

  • Trancers

    Trancers

    ★★★½

    badass movie

  • House of Gucci

    House of Gucci

    ★★★★

    #3 in 2021

    Wow, Driver does the near impossible and stars in all 3 of my top 3 of the year, damn go off boy

    anyway this is a lot of fun, after this I had to walk home in 1 degree celsius weather for like an hour so I'm not gonna say too much but I think I'm just really grateful that Ridley can drop a movie like this at 83 and make it look easy. Obviously not my…

  • Naked Gun 33⅓: The Final Insult

    Naked Gun 33⅓: The Final Insult

    ★★★½

    obviously it was still gonna be terrific, I don't think the formula is necessarily thin at this point but this definitely has the worst pacing out of the three and, even though Segal's direction is pretty faithful to the first two movies, I can't help but wonder if Zucker remained as director it'd be better. All that matters really is that this still got a good few belly laughs out of me and it did! right out of the gate in the BEST baby-on-stairs sequence you'll see this side of Potemkin and Untouchables. I just love these stupid movies.

  • Stick It

    Stick It

    ★★★

    really 2003 for a movie from 2006

    girls are awesome and all you gotta do to let the audience know one is cool and rebellious is to wear a different punk band tee in each scene and bam you got a motion picture

  • Home Sweet Home Alone

    Home Sweet Home Alone

    did actually want to like this but it's just so fucking grating, tiring, poorly made and lazy with such a fucking annoying asshole kid in the lead and mannnnnn I sound like such an ass ripping into a kid's movie but man compare it to Home Alone and see how little soul or spark is there, hell even the 3rd one's, like, okay. Bad bad bad.

  • Last Christmas

    Last Christmas

    ★★

    unbearably awful and mean egotistical adult-children do not make for great protagonists in your movie, who knew !

  • Hawkeye

    Hawkeye

    suck my dick and balls

  • Red Notice

    Red Notice

    Do I hate movies or just being alive

  • The Christmas Bow

    The Christmas Bow

    ★★½

    oh bow I get it because she plays violin

  • Christmas in Evergreen

    Christmas in Evergreen

    ★★½

    depression takin me to the strangest of places today frfr

  • What About Bob?

    What About Bob?

    ★★½

    janice soprano plays a sex worker in the first 20 minutes

    not funny at all other than the kinda cosmic wow-it-keeps-going, dreyfuss is expectedly great but it feels like murray doesn't even care -- it's too light and safe to ever do anything big let alone anything worth it but i've seen plenty worse dumb comedies yeah whatever it's fine