Favorite films

  • Poltergeist
  • Paprika
  • Total Recall
  • Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Recent activity

  • Everything Everywhere All at Once


  • The Mitchells vs. The Machines


  • Ghostbusters: Afterlife


  • Made You Look: A True Story About Fake Art


Recent reviews

  • Everything Everywhere All at Once

    Everything Everywhere All at Once


    It's a relief that I don't have to keep attempting to write my own bizarre, heartwarming, multiversal action comedies anymore because I won't do it better than this.

  • The Mitchells vs. The Machines

    The Mitchells vs. The Machines


    Crafted with frightening efficiency to make you laugh and cry with maximum intensity and volume.

Popular reviews

  • Dune



    I actually went to high school with Shai-Hulud and he was NOT that big irl. The stuff about eating people that didn't walk across the sand right was true though.

  • House



    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Any movie that is less than *sublime* should be held against House.

    First act not really making your main character likable enough? Why not shoot it like a shampoo commercial?
    Second act lacking tension? Have a piano eat a kid.
    Third act unsatisfactory? Name one of your characters "Kung Fu" and give her the ability to kick ghosts in the face.

    Sound crazy? Tough shit, because House did all of it, and it rules, so now you have no excuse. God DAMMIT I am mad I did not see this when I was 12 years old, I would have grown up so much cooler.