Annette

Annette

okay, where to start....first off, can i just say that this made me really miss the days of the Twilight cgi vampire baby? at least that had the quality of genuine uncanniness to it by virtue of seeming like a mistake, and therefore a more convincing savior miracle baby than this shit. this is christmas tree cinema, every branch bedecked with ornament, it can't let a moment land unoccupied by some obnoxious flourish and thus it fills every possible second of screentime with spectacle, so terrified is this movie of the chance of you having an unanticipated thought during a moment of quiet or of some sprouted tendril of organic life by accident pushing its way through the depressingly well-trod and barren soil of this narrative. if you have seen the opening scene of this you have seen the whole thing.
ngl the puppet baby is a perfect fit because this whole thing is wooden and lifeless and airless and stock and pat (okay, you say, well that's opera/musical theatre/whatever, and to that i say this isn't opera it's film and the emotional weight certainly isn't carried by the songs lol), and the falsest moment in the film is the ending where we exchange the puppet for a child actor in some trite parody of granting agency. every time i watch a movie like this i'm going to have to raise my Malignant rating half a star because at least it has the decency to never say a single thing about The Way We Live Now. clearly written by one of those twitter 28 year olds you don't follow who posts threads like "25 red flag behaviors to watch out for" between screenshots of netflix shows

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