Call Me by Your Name

Call Me by Your Name ★★★★★

i’ve been struggling to fall in love with this movie again. After watching it 8 times, it stopped feeling like a dream and started feeling like a nightmare. It’s like it was bragging to me, you’ll never fall in love, the closest you’ll get is a bald 40 year old that uses you as porn. Then last night while i was home alone hugging my dog, i tried to watch it again. i  recontextualized it for myself. instead of watching and waiting for the first kiss, i watched for their goodbye at the train station. i watched it for the closure i havnt had, and the scenes of elio alone in his room, and talking to marzia and chiara.  My favorite scene used to be the nosebleed. now it’s the futile devices/ traitor scenes. the scenes i can relate to. not the scenes i wish i could relate to.. and that’s how i fell back in love with call me by your name.

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