The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

This is everything. This is peak experience, warts and all. The phrase 'cinema' derived from the Greek word Kinema, meaning movement, combined with the first letter of chainsaw, c. 141 or so years after the invention, or discovery, of the phenakistiscope, mankind found itself facing a new type of cinema wheel in motion: the chainsaw. The chainsaw was everything. The chainsaw was family. The advent of another 12 years saw the continued perfection of cinema from a different angle...

I had to walk away from this review for a solid 45 minutes in order to calm down and gather my thoughts on this movie and I kinda just sat and my mind went blank. It's like a tornado tore through the landscape of my brain and ripped every house and tree from the root. What can I say that's already been said? "How stupid of those critics in '86 were for not getting it???" How is someone as unilaterally small and insignificant as I supposed to put into words the emotional cascade that you feel watching Dennis Hopper chainsaw battle with Leatherface in an underground Spielbergian Hook™️ nightmare reverse treehouse that spirals down towards hell rather than upwards towards the uh, the sky where grandma lives.

Hooper repaints Texas as a kind of True Stories esque world of idiosyncrasies and positive hospitality. A world where Caroline "Streeeeetch" Williams'll lay it down on your late nite radio before putting on something for those real rock fans out there: top-of-their-game Oingo Boingo. No One Lives Forever under the Texan sun, except for Grandpa. I'll definitely be re-watching this endlessly. Dennis Hopper lives on in my heart and on screen. He's certainly alive in this one in particular. Leatherface too <3. I love you, Bubba, you big bastard. You're the face of an entire generation......... an icon in these troubling times. It's been nearly 4 years since your last appearance, and almost nothing but bad has happened since! C'mon home, Junior! We miss you! (note: author is not from Texas)

In Conclusion, reviews are stupid. You can't recapture the feeling this movie evokes in simple words. This is peak 80's cinema. This is maybe the third peak of Tobe's career. When I die bury me with a copy of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 and we'll leave it at that.

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