“And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.”
― John Steinbeck, East of Eden

Guess who cried... cried again...

School ends tomorrow. Another year ends, a new one will begin in 3 months, same old story. You stop feeling anxious for a certain thing, and then you start feeling anxious for something different, negativity is not something you can escape, but a bit of humanism and optimism never hurted anyone. I think I am going through a phase right now where I am mature enough to not be allowed to be a child anymore, but I am also not old enough to be an adult and it's all so confusing. I don't know whether I will achieve my dreams or become someone I do not want to become, whether I will go to America or stay here in Greece and whether all of those things will effect how much time I will spend with my father, who will probably not stay with me for a whole lot due to his health problems, and having lost 2 of my most beloved friends in the span of a few months still makes me feel so broken. Sometimes life is like a mountain and the older you get the harder it is to climb it, but movies like this one make the process seem more joyous. Lady Bird is such a formative film for me(it is in fact the movie that made me want to become a filmmaker, and if you have been following me for a while you have probably read my previous writeups on this and why it just breaks my heart while at the same time completely warming it) and so many others share my feelings on it, and I feel like the reason the movie resonates with thousands is not because of how Lady Bird starts as an asshole and later develops into a mature individual but more because the movie contains the most universal images in all of cinema: Lady Bird starts the movie crying in her mother's car, angry and overwhelmed by the situation she jumps off the car and injurs herself in an attempt to break free from the situation she feels trapped in, and when the movie ends she drives her own car and is in love and truly appreciates everything that surrounds her, everything that was there when she wasn't paying attention. And there is an entire epic poem contained in these images about growing up, forging an identity and what it feels to deeply love the ones that always loved you that Greta captures with so much tenderness and magic that moves me beyond words, it makes me want to tell my own stories and create something special and otherwordly to comfort a few kids that just feel lost and confused, like Greta has done for me. We are all we've got, people, our parents are our silent guardians, the ones that gaves us umbrellas when it was raining, the ones that offered us the warmest of embraces when the whole world felt cold.

Oh to watch this one more fucking time with Penelope and then dance with her... you don't get how beautifully certain things are until they are gone.