Emo Philips

Emo Philips Pro

Favorite films

  • Longlegs
  • Terrifier 3
  • Nosferatu
  • Saw XI

Recent activity

  • Jurassic Park III


  • Resurrection


  • Dune


  • Scarface


Pinned reviews

  • Scarface




    The 80's were great - there's a scene where Michelle Pfeiffer is getting ready for bed and takes a few bumps of coke, sips her cocktail, then takes a nice drag from her cigarette! Wild that The Terminator came out a year after this, I would have bet that the final assassin wearing sunglasses and wielding a shotgun was a reference to that.

    What can I say about this that hasn't already been said? It's a…

  • Carlito's Way

    Carlito's Way


    I had a dream, Charlie. But now I'm awake, and I hate my dream. 

    Full of panache and a tremendous third act. Carlito is doing everything he can to get out, but the city keeps trying to pull him back in. It's a story that's been told so many times, but few capture it as compellingly as de Palma. He isn't shy about showing you the inevitable conclusion from the very first second, but I still felt so tense at…

Recent reviews

  • Jurassic Park III

    Jurassic Park III


    Some of the worst things imaginable are done with the best intentions.
     - me, gesturing towards the producers of this film

    Besides the introduction of flying dinosaurs, this stinks! The first half is just redoing stuff already done in the first two but less compelling, while reusing some of the sequel set pieces with no creativity. There's literally a dream sequence with a talking dinosaur...what?

    The story doesn't interest me, Dr Grant going there doesn't make sense, and the characters are mostly painful to follow. This doesn't feel at all like a critical chapter in the Jurassic Park saga.

    The Jurassic Parks, Ranked!

  • Resurrection



    Moral of the story: don't be too convincing in your sadistic brainwashing, it can backfire!

    I'm a big fan of the Rebecca Hall Losing Her Shit Cinematic Universe, but this has some plot issues that prevent me from really loving it. It seemingly tries to offer two options of "woman goes nuts" and "completely fantastical phenomena in otherwise normal world", but noticeably avoids interacting Roth's character with anyone, which really eliminates option 2 from being true reality. The story is…

Popular reviews

  • Malignant


    If Patrick Wilson doesn't show up in this I'll lose my shit

  • We're All Going to the World's Fair

    We're All Going to the World's Fair


    While enduring the many long, dull scenes, I began to think up how this film could possibly end in an interesting way. Will she spiral into psychosis and supernatural body horror? Is this a Weeb Who Cried Wolf situation where she is faking it at first, but then it becomes real? Is the challenge a prank to trick autistic people into outing themselves by trying to save a World's Fair "victim"? Is this a Synecdoche, New York-esque version of seeing…