Theo Pro

Favorite films

  • Magnolia
  • Martin Eden
  • The Last Temptation of Christ
  • Tokyo Sonata

Recent activity

  • Only God Forgives


  • One Day

  • The Holdovers


  • Cool Hand Luke


Pinned reviews

  • Late Spring

    Late Spring


    Been waiting for Ozu to make me cry, so it’s only right that when he did it was a fairly seismic wave. Setsuko Hara’s face is one i’ve grown to associate with a glowing, warm smile in Ozu’s films, likely the most charming i’ve seen, a legendary signature. She’s a balm, a relief, her smile an anti-depressant - to see her breakdown here, that shit isn’t easy. When she does smile in Late Spring it isn’t the accustomed bringer of…

  • Aguirre, the Wrath of God

    Aguirre, the Wrath of God


    Movie so loyal to the principles of method acting that they all seemed to travel back in time and lose themselves there. Pure mesmerising hallucinatory cinema. The least romantic historical ‘epic’. Grandiose fantasies suffocate and erode as devastation and doom are on all sides. Like watching something you shouldn’t be allowed to see. Flawless, transcendent, uncompromising savagery that couldn’t be realised by anyone but Werner Herzog and his demented, calculating muse in Klaus Kinski. Scenes of carrying cannons down precarious mountain sides,…

Recent reviews

  • The Holdovers

    The Holdovers


    Keep your head up, alright? You can do this. 

    Holy shit man this god damn movie. Crying at every damn scene. When Giamatti says the above line he rips my chest open and holds my heart in his hand. Shoutout to the misfits, the loners and the holdovers

  • Pulp Fiction

    Pulp Fiction


    Butch, whose motorcycle is this? 
    It’s a chopper, baby. 
    Whose chopper is this? 
    Who’s Zed? 
    Zed’s dead, baby. Zed’s dead.

    Tarantino has certified psychotic galaxy brain film takes but man I love to listen to his movies speak

Popular reviews

  • Thor: Love and Thunder

    Thor: Love and Thunder


    Taika Waititi laughing at his own jokes for 2 hours. Marvel using queer characters as decorative design posing as representation. Bale good (obviously), emotional core just about intact, weightless surroundings abundant, movie pretty insufferable

  • Texas Chainsaw Massacre

    Texas Chainsaw Massacre

    Look how they (Texas Chainsaw) Massacred my boy