Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker ★★★

Much like a dog seeing a skateboard I’m going to have HARD OPINIONS. I am firmly in the camp of “you chickened the fuck out” when you (semi) retconned The Last Jedi AKA the best Star Wars movie and actually rather good movie movie. It’s hard to watch a film that you know twerps will love when the whole time you’re thinking “there’s a much more interesting movie that could have been”. Yes I’m biased because Carrie Fisher is icon gay lord, but still, v predictable and fan-wanky. OH LOOK I wrote a review about a Star Wars movie, you may take my phone and laptop away please sir - yes the lake is fine - Attach rocks.