Synopsis
There are a thousand ways to raise your adrenaline. Today, Chev Chelios will need every single one.
Professional assassin Chev Chelios learns his rival has injected him with a poison that will kill him if his heart rate drops.
2006 Directed by Brian Taylor, Mark Neveldine
Professional assassin Chev Chelios learns his rival has injected him with a poison that will kill him if his heart rate drops.
Jason Statham Amy Smart José Pablo Cantillo Efren Ramirez Dwight Yoakam Carlos Sanz Reno Wilson Edi Gathegi Glenn Howerton Jay Xcala Keone Young Valarie Rae Miller Yousuf Azami Laurent Schwaar David Brown Dorian Kingi Med Abrous Daniel Stevens Wally Lozano David T. Green Eve Loseth Allen Bloomfield Stephanie Mace Chester Bennington Michael McLafferty Earl Carroll Brian Swibel Donnie Smith Sean Graham Show All…
Tom Rosenberg Gary Lucchesi Skip Williamson Peter Block Michael Paseornek Eric Reid Michael Davis Ted Gidlow David Scott Rubin
Ezra Dweck Julia Evershade Eric Lindemann Bryan O. Watkins William R. Dean Mark Larry Matthew T. Duncan Ken S. Polk
בלתי יציב, Crank 1, Zastaneš a neprežiješ
alternate title: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
The cinematic equivalent of snorting cocaine. It's everything I should hate in a movie - it's loud, crass, childish, and dumb - but I loved every insane second of it. The plot is paper thin in the best way, basically just an excuse for Jason Statham to rush around the city like a madman violently antagonizing everybody he possibly can with unimaginable levels of collateral damage. It's also probably Statham's best role, combining his usual intimidating deadpan style with surprising comedic timing. It's the definition of unpretentious, completely devoid of any self-seriousness, and it's just absolutely bonkers, balls-to-the-wall, vulgar cinematic perfection. I'm so happy this exists.
Relentless frenetic action accompanied by pulse pounding kickass tunes! Gratuitous entertainment fraught with unbridled badassness!
Hyperactive adrenaline pumping violence and mayhem!
the two most annoying dudes you went to film school with who had the worst taste made a movie... and it turned out to fucking rule.
Does it look like I got cunt written on my head? Who do you think you are fucking with?
Crank is an experience unlike any other. Being strapped down to a chair in a dark room and getting doped up with any and every drug under the sun designed to increase your heart rate and perspiration all the while being surrounded by dozens of TV sets blaring fragmented heavy metal music videos is the only comparable physical equivalent.
A nightmare to some**
(**most)
But to a select few, Crank is a transcendent experience that has "cult status" written on its forehead. No, not the word "cunt." This film on the outside appears to be an eccentric, sleazy, stupid, dumbfoundedly bizarre…
Pure, uncut Sinema.
Movie still holds up as the most adrenalized, punk rock, Un-PC, FUCK YOU to cinematic convention. And I’m always Gaytham For Statham but Chev Chelios is one for the ages.
"Crank" is the closest thing we will ever get to a "Grand Theft Auto" movie. Unexplainably foreign "crime guy" Statham has to keep his heart rate up by committing acts that will boost his adrenaline. Red Bull, cocaine, and sex work as temporary power-ups. Cars are jacked. Track suits are worn. Overhead maps are shown. Side missions lead to main missions, cops are curiously absent amidst the chaos, and there's a big boss waiting at the end of it all. There are subversive music queues that work as layered jokes, ancillary side characters that satirize "gangland" stereotypes, and a Tom and Jerry sense of evanescence that allows the characters the ability to do (and say) outlandish things without knocking the…
Statham fucking a woman from behind in public while yelling “I’m Alive” reminds me that starting a podcast about him was a wonderful idea. what a mad movie
Crank poisons Statham's usual calm yet aggressive demeanour with a serum that transforms him into an unstoppable adrenaline junkie, with Neveldine/Taylor capturing his balls-to-the-wall antics with an assaultive albeit rough style, that just runs out of epinephrine during the third act.
Nope. No. Definitely not.
- Ollivander (and me, after watching this film)
Considered deleting this app before admitting I watched all 88 minutes of this.
I’d like to take a defibrillator to the chest if I meant I could forget this movie. Give me the Chinese synthetic so I can pass right on out.
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