2017 Directed by Michael Bay
Autobots and Decepticons are at war, with humans on the sidelines. Optimus Prime is gone. The key to saving our future lies buried in the secrets of the past, in the hidden history of Transformers on Earth.
Mark Wahlberg Josh Duhamel Stanley Tucci Anthony Hopkins Laura Haddock Minti Gorne Isabela Moner Jerrod Carmichael Santiago Cabrera John Turturro Glenn Morshower Liam Garrigan Mitch Pileggi Tony Hale Gil Birmingham Nicola Peltz Shia LaBeouf Peter Cullen Gemma Chan Frank Welker Erik Aadahl Jim Carter Omar Sy Ken Watanabe John Goodman John DiMaggio Reno Wilson Jess Harnell Tom Kenny Show All…
Akiva Goldsman Steven Spielberg Lorenzo Di Bonaventura Ian Bryce Michael Bay Brian Goldner Don Murphy Daren Hicks
Jeffrey Beecroft Anthony Caron-Delion Todd Cherniawsky Geoffrey S. Grimsman Andrew McCarthy Hugo Santiago Sebastian Schroder Scott David Winn Mark Walters David E. Scott Jennifer Bash Anna Bregman Jourdan Henderson Matthew Horan Marco Anton Restivo Rudie Schaefer Ed Natividad Kevin Cross Erick Donaldson Scott Herbertson Robert Andrew Johnson Bria Kinter Julien Pougnier Mike Stassi Robert Woodruff
Peta Bayley Paul Kavanagh Rick O'Connor Jeff Capogreco Rick Lupton Ryan Church Thang Le Christoph Roth Annie Normandin Ryan Wiederkehr Julie Kubbillun Scott Farrar Jason Smith Sheldon Stopsack Antoine Whyte Julian Foddy Berter Orpak
Erik Aadahl Jason W. Jennings Tobias Poppe Malte Bieler Chris Diebold Brandon Jones Jon Title Randy Torres Tim Walston Eilam Hoffman James Mather Jeffrey J. Haboush Greg P. Russell Gary Summers Ethan van der Ryn Joel Erickson
Tom DeSanto/Don Murphy Production Ian Bryce Productions Huahua Media Di Bonaventura Pictures Paramount Pictures (Canada)
Transformers 5: The Last Knight, Transformers 5, Transformers 5 - O Último Cavaleiro, Transformers 5: Az utolsó lovag, Transformers - The Last Knight, Transformers 5: El Ultimo Caballero
"I didn't make this movie for the critics. I didn't even make it for the fans. I just made it for Matt." -- Michael Bay
Easily the most baffling, incoherent, plastic, and gorgeous installment since REVENGE OF THE FALLEN, but sadly significantly less assaultive and toxic, tamer on that front even than AGE OF EXTINCTION. And yet Bay re-staging the opening of GLADIATOR and then later on pulling his own Omaha Beach with giant asshole robots is still a sight to behold; loaded with crazy wire pulls, car flips, and practical pyro…he's still the only guy doing this stuff properly. If you can make the choice to tune into this wavelength these movies aren't like anything else out there.
when i turned my car on to leave the screening, "fortunate son" was on the radio. that seems like it should mean something.
but what is meaning anymore? in the transformers movies, dinosaurs were put on earth by aliens and were actually robots, which seems like some psycho fundamentalist anti-evolution bullshit, but transforming is evolution. there is some religious imagery in this installment, and some vaguely intriguing stuff about the way faith and science work together to save the earth. but god is an evil alien robot tentacle lady, which seems pretty blasphemous? some of the robots are stupid racist caricatures, but this movie has many small supporting roles for non-white people...one of the heroes is a 14yr old latina,…
If you thought Michael Bay went full Michael Bay years ago, I present you Transformers: The Last Knight. You seriously have no idea. I loved the opening. Michael Bay goes full Michael Bay in medieval times. Apparently there were tons of explosions in medieval times, who would have known?
Transformers: The Last Knight is unintentionally hilarious due to its sheer ridiculousness. I laughed out loud several times through out the film. The narrative and tone is everywhere. Yet, I found everything going on fascinating. I was glued to the screen and thoroughly engaged.
Mark Wahlberg goes Elliot Moore from The Happening on our asses. Anthony Hopkins is hamming it up and calling people dickheads. Cogman is a C3P0 knockoff and…
??/100
Was I disappointed? Yes. Does that matter? Not....really?
Some random notes:
- I forgot how the 'police car' Deception has "punish and enslave" written near his bumper.
- There's a cut from Arthurian legend to a sight in the cosmos and I immediately thought of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Take that as you will.
- Anthony Hopkins did this to get paid and get photographed in slow motion while wearing nice clothes. I'd do the same.
- Bumblebee re-connects himself mid-battle like a wrathful pile of magnets and it's the most formally dazzling thing in any of these movies.
- That, sadly, makes up most of the interest in regards to amazement beyond Bay's typically superlative tech fetishes. The…
I haven't been this confused by a movie since the first time I watched Mulholland Drive.
??/100
What dazzling, wondrous nonsense. The constantly shifting aspect ratio is oddly fitting for such an incoherent piece of plasticity and fantasy - each frame its own entity, apathetic of its peers. Mark Wahlberg threatens a child and Stanley Tucci plays Merlin. Whatever *this* is, you can be sure of two things: the formal complexity and visual work is something only Bay could accomplish, and the inept execution of its narrative is something only Bay could accomplish. He's above (and far below) his peers in different ways.
Michael Bay scheint inzwischen genauso gehasst zu werden wie Uwe Boll.
Bei diesem Film einfach Hirn aus, Filmanlage an und Spaß haben.
Optisch und Tontechnisch 1A.
Macht Riesenspaß.
Grimlock ate the cop car. That was funny. Ha ha ha... Then no more Dinobots. :'( Instead now crazy butler bot and Knight bots, Wizards and Dragons, Submarines oh my! Marky Mark now Knight, right? Anthony Hopkins visits Stone Hedge. Moon mounts Earth with no consent. Lady Wizard wins the Quidditch match!
Just saved you 2 and a half hours. You're welcome!
*Interrupted viewing, will rate on rewatch but this is like 4 stars easily*
Autumn Faust alludes to this film taking the form of a new kind of modernism and I'm inclined to agree. The shifting aspect ratio only increases the chaotic dynamism between the rapid-fire cuts and the imagery (the only comparison I can think of is if you were reading Cormac McCarthy's terse prose but the font changed every few words), and the speedy narrative structure in conjunction brings to mind verse, the way myths are written in shorthand, i.e something to the extent of "Vivian took hold of the stick and in her hand it turned into the Staff of Merlin. Then Optimus appeared, followed by a veil…
Michael bay does Michael Bay and it is fun. That's all. The bloated runtime is bad and that young girl is a pain in the ass but the dumb story and the visually pleasing action and special effects make it a fun watch that in my opinion shows that Michael Bay can still make enjoyable films even if they are dumb and non-sensical.
I don't know what to say. It's obviously awful by any standard metric, but yet somehow I enjoyed it. Mostly because it is so mental.
Anthony Hopkins is having the time of his life in this
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