Noel Mellor

Author and ex-podcaster, former marketing professional now a lecturer and academic smart arse. Star of Bridget Jones 3.

Favorite films

  • Shaun of the Dead
  • Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping
  • The Lost Boys
  • Moon

Recent activity

  • Transformers: Dark of the Moon


  • Sisu


  • The Covenant


  • Fast X


Pinned reviews

  • John Carter

    John Carter


    With the heart of classic 80s adventure and a modern aesthetic, #johncarter did what so many have failed to do. It made me feel like a kid.

  • Boiling Point

    Boiling Point


    Fuck table 7.

Recent reviews

  • Transformers: Dark of the Moon

    Transformers: Dark of the Moon


    Compared to the last one at least, this was actually pretty enjoyable. It’s too long and suffers a lot of the same problems of the franchise, but it’s coherent. Didn’t hate it.

  • Sisu



    Ridiculous campy cult fun, with a nicely polished visual edge and a tight, pacy runtime that makes it all the more enjoyable.

Popular reviews

  • Upside Down

    Upside Down


    Seriously. This film is so reliant on the suspension of disbelief that it becomes completely ridiculous.

    There are things that could probably be explained easily, alongside essential plot machinations that make no sense whatsoever. So what does the movie do to address the issue? Nothing. Instead it leaves the viewer scrabbling around looking for something to cling to - like the characters in the film who manipulate the rules of gravity to suit whatever the…

  • Possession



    What the hell did I just see?

    Its hard to recommend this film, being that it is one of the strangest things I've ever seen. However, if you want to spend two hours watching something as powerful, deranged, bizarre and thrilling as you can imagine, you need to give it a shot. It won't be for everyone - and I couldn't argue with those who hate it - but Possession is something pretty amazing, though perhaps just in its own…