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  • Audition

    Audition

    ★★★½

    Miike’s slow-burn break-through is a bitter moral pill about treating women as possessions instead of people. “It’s like picking out your first car!” Yoshikawa says to the widowed Shigehiko, while auditioning wannabe actresses Shigehiko can make a move on later. This being a horror movie, he’s going to deeply regret randomly plucking a pliant mystery woman to be his object of sexual fulfillment.

    It’s 48 minutes in before our first hint that this movie’s going to get dark. AUDITION has…

  • Heilstätten

    Heilstätten

    Obnoxious, loud, uninteresting found footage dive into a haunted hospital. There’s no good reason for this to exist ($!); certainly no reason to watch it.

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  • Wrath of the Titans

    Wrath of the Titans

    ★★

    Exploding Dirt: The Motion Picture.

  • Blubberella

    Blubberella

    ½

    Based on a joke that no one wanted to see ("What if Bloodrayne was fat?") comes another amateur-hour Uwe Boll film. It's sub-Friedberg & Seltzer parody, complete with black face and a sympathetic Hitler (played by Boll himself). You've been warned...