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  • The Fury

    The Fury

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    Hot dog skin kirk douglas doing a charlton heston impression amidst an intense misunderstanding of science .
    Its got everything you never knew you wanted; tiny shorts, prolonged staring, an exploding body, and ice cream sundaes.

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  • John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum

    John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum

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    All action (counted 8 specific crotchall annihilations) no real plot. Which is fine because as a stunt appreciator, it was all fight sequence eye-candy. Halle berry was fierce AF and I was really sad there wasn’t more of her, and the adjudicator was so mind blowingly awful I knocked it down half a star. So the first installment remains, imho, the best, but this was still a fun watch if you like watching people smash other people into glass (which I do).

  • The Angel

    The Angel

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    Musically & visually wonderful (albeit too long) tale of an absolutely stunning and cold-blooded sociopathβ€”- however this β€œre-imagining” of the real Carlos Eduardo Robledo Puch skips all the rape and attempted baby killing. 
    Maybe it banks a little too much on the kid’s physical appeal. Without knowing how to properly articulate it; I just feel like personally I’d felt more affected if I was denied a little more? The real Carlos surely wasn’t as whimsical. 

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  • Atomic Blonde

    Atomic Blonde

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    Can we please retire David Bowie’s β€œCat People” from soundtracks? 
    There’s like... deeper cuts, man. And its rendering that song powerless. 

    As a whole, Atomic Blonde is heavy handed, impractical, and lacking in character. 
    It LOOKS good ( like a jonathan Viner painting), but its kinda... not enough? 
    Not enough for this sort of movie at least.  Like when the rich kid you know asks you where to get punk patches for their jacket- thats what this feels like. 

    I…

  • Dark Angel

    Dark Angel

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    The premise is that a bleach blonde alien named Talec only learned one phrase of human english and it doesn’t mean what he thinks it does. I’m wondering if the CD he keeps killing everyone with was his language tutorial and that’s why he is extra frustrated. 
    This has a similar endorphin snatching plot as Liquid Sky, but with roundhouse action, & Dolph’s sass set to 11. 
    I’d have given it 5 stars except they never explain where Dolph went for 8 days, and while I imagine he just needed some β€œme time,” it’s killing me they don’t ever say it.