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  • Land of the Dead

    Land of the Dead


    I’m more forgiving of its faults at 35 than 20.

    Still shoulda been called Cameo of the Dead.

  • Wendigo


    While some of the interscene environment shots were (for the time) interesting, the protagonists are wholly unlikable and I walked away from this rooting for the villainized locals à la Tucker & Dale. It's an overlong X-Files episode or a lesser precursor to also-ran Masters of Horror.

  • Yummy



    The physical gags really elevate this one above the majority of zom-coms; but alas, if you've seen one mainland European zombie film set in a hospital where a guy lights his dick afire and a protagonist fashions a rescue rope out of the plethora of spilled intestines on offer, you've seen 'em all.

  • The Golden Glove

    The Golden Glove


    Dark comedy is when Fritz shoves hastily wrapped body parts into his crawl space among other already rotting appendages, then places two little tree-shaped air fresheners on the heap before sealing it up.

  • The Inner Scar

    The Inner Scar

    Symbolic or shambolic? Insufferable bullshit like this makes me regret sobriety. Only saving grace is decent music from the noted anti-Semite that stars in this hollow travesty. 👎🏼

  • The Ninth Gate

    The Ninth Gate


    Not sure why this is such a comfort watch, but I’ve seen it well over half a dozen times and will revisit it again in a year or two. It’s not even a particularly great film, nor do I consider it to be Polanski’s best, but goddamn if it isn’t a mood.

  • Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster

    Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster


    Sure it’s not good, but by george it’s entertaining. Also digging the knock-off Everly Brothers tune from the Distant Cousins.

  • The Perfume of the Lady in Black

    The Perfume of the Lady in Black


    I found it to be remarkably average, but I’m not above a rewatch down the line during a time which I can devote my attention undivided.

  • The Land of Steady Habits

    The Land of Steady Habits


    Bad jokes I made while watching this:
    “He’s getting stoned out of his gourd.”
    “Is this genre called Mendelcore?”

  • Rambo: First Blood Part II

    Rambo: First Blood Part II


    This mostly just made me want to rewatch Hot Shots! Part Deux. And don’t think I didn’t notice that box of J&B on the riverboat.

  • Robin Hood

    Robin Hood


    Could’ve at least had the decency to cast Bill Bailey as Friar Tuck instead of an off-brand.

  • My Valentine

    My Valentine

    Vs. Scott Redpilgrim