Matthew Huff

Matthew Huff

Favorite films

  • Ocean's Eleven
  • Big Fat Liar
  • The Talented Mr. Ripley
  • Tangerine

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  • Knight of Fortune

    ★★★★

  • The After

    ★★

  • The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar

    ★★★★

  • Island in Between

    ★★★½

Recent reviews

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  • Argylle

    Argylle

    ★★★½

    Overview: This should have been the 2024 movie titled Twisters.

    Best Performance: Like you expect me to give a name that’s not Dua Lipa? AS IF.

    Best Scene: Whatever twist it is where you learn the books are repressed memories. 

    Worst Thing About the Movie: The CG almost Flubber-esque fight scenes and also twists 6-34.

    Special Shout-out: Oil that works like ice but also doesn’t stick to dresses.

    Thought I Had While Watching: Bryce Dallas Howard’s career should be studied by science. How has one women been in so many bad movies and yet kept receiving franchises?

    Role Anne Hathaway Should Have Played: Ellie Conway.

  • Flamin' Hot

    Flamin' Hot

    ★★½

    Overview: No way this is actually how Hot Cheetos got invented but sure close enough. 

    Best Performance: The little boy

    Best Scene: Everybody passing out the Cheetos

    Worst Thing About the Movie: It’s so glossy.

    Special Shout-out: Judy. The real one.

    Thought I Had While Watching: Is Tony Shaloub Hispanic?

    Role Anne Hathaway Should Have Played: Tony Shalboub’s boss of Frito Lay.

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  • Red, White & Royal Blue

    Red, White & Royal Blue

    ★★★

    Overview: Enemies to lovers, but it’s gay sex in the White House.

    Best Performance: Slim pickings here but I’m gonna go with the press secretary? chief of staff? whoever she was.

    Best Scene: When the hot prince was bottoming.

    Worst Thing About the Movie: Not enough sex and nudity. I was expecting Bridgerton/My Policeman energy. 

    Special Shout-out: To the dream of democrats someday winning Texas

    Thought I Had While Watching: *redacted*

    Role Anne Hathaway Should Have Played: Give her the Uma role. She really needs to play the mother of a gay son in something. She’d be perfect at it.

  • Napoleon

    Napoleon

    ★★

    Overview: How to Make a Three-Hour-Long Movie Feel Like Six: A Guide

    Best Performance: Rupert Everett 

    Best Scene: Vanessa Kirby looking bored as hell during sex.

    Worst Thing About the Movie: Didn’t use “Waterloo” by ABBA once.

    Special Shout-out: Leo Tolstoy for knowing Napoleon sucked a long time ago.

    Thought I Had While Watching: House of Gucci really made Ridley Scott say “fine everyone use whatever accent you feel like on this one.”

    Role Anne Hathaway Should Have Played: Napoleon

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