Vox Lux

Vox Lux ★★★★½

the camerawork is so slick,, always pulling her away from us. and maybe that’s why so many people hated this ,,, because we never really get to know her before she became this eccentric/manic thing we follow around like a puppy for 113 minutes. Even so I felt I knew her during a couple scenes and even related to her at some point. And I don’t mean I related to the “im ugly” and the “im scared.” That’s everyone. I related to her acute desperation and denial/self-sabotage. (Get on my level of depression lol.) And when the movie ended I was willing to wait a few more hours if only to know (even just to witness ) more . And that’s how I feel about myself sometimes. I feel this incessant longing to understand myself: why are you like this bitch??? but also!!!!! I know why. We know why. Or we should, at least, and it’s terrifying to know. But it’s supposed to be and there’s no way around that. Just like there’s no way around the discomfort while watching most of this. The school shooting scene is a breaking point. The initial cut. And it’s some miracle that we (that I :( ) continue to survive in the in-between after the fact. Inbetween life and death. Yes, I needed to overshare. For documentation if nothing else . people who hate this refuse to get on the ride from the beginning . AND yeah this isnt for everyone: not everyone has endured trauma like this. I love Natalie and regarding that accent ?honestly she could speak in tongues and i would rave. This held me tightly ( a vice-like grip, really) and still hasn’t let me go (it’s been five hours since the credits started rolling) and that’s what great cinema is about for me. As long as it lingers.

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