• Saw X

    Saw X

    ★★★½

    DO NOT order brain surgery from shein!

  • Strange Way of Life

    Strange Way of Life

    ★★½

    saint laurent are a bunch of losers for choosing to not have their name in the silly cowboy font

  • Bottoms

    Bottoms

    ★★★½

    the epic highs and lows of high school football

  • No One Will Save You

    No One Will Save You

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    pulling the mental-health card to get out of being probed

  • El Conde

    El Conde

    ★★½

    the greatest horror of all was the prospect that thatcher may still be alive

  • Point Break

    Point Break

    ★★★★

    hate to see him leave…love to watch him go

  • Bend It Like Beckham

    Bend It Like Beckham

    ★★★

    i prefer my sports films not to be about the game, but the lesbians that played

  • Saw 3D

    Saw 3D

    ★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    somehow, doctor gordon returned

  • Saw VI

    Saw VI

    ★★★½

    classic john getting all philosophical and shit

  • Gran Turismo

    Gran Turismo

    ★★½

    literally me if nissan scouted people who are fucking sick at coconut mall

  • Past Lives

    Past Lives

    ★★★★

    found a version without subtitles, to get the full arthur experience

  • 28 Days Later

    28 Days Later

    ★★★★

    if i was in that situation first thing i wouldve done is poo in buckingham palace