Guardians of the Galaxy ★★★★

No raccoons or tree creatures were harmed during the making of this film.
^(Yes it actually says that at the end of the credits and I was the only one who noticed in my family)

"You said it yourself bitch, we're the Guardians of the Galaxy."- Peter Quill (aka: Star Lord)

I fucking hate people. This was one of the worst audiences I have ever had the opportunity to watch a film with. A bunch of stupid little kids had the annoying habit of quoting lines from the trailer as they were happening in the film. One kid happily quoted the 'fake laugh monologue' along with Rocket. Fuck that kid. Oh did I mention he was walking out of the theater to go to the bathroom or get a drink or something as he was quoting it. Once again, fuck that kid. Then as the credits were rolling a lady in the row in front of me turns on the flashlight on her phone to look for something she dropped, so for like 2 or 3 minutes she's shining her fucking light everywhere, blinding everyone in the process. Fuck her, too.

Also, are people really such dumbasses? Have they never seen a fucking Marvel movie? There is always something after the credits you dumb motherfuckers, so why are you leaving? Anyways, my rant on hating people is over. I saw the first trailer for the third Hobbit a few days ago and even though I'm very skeptical for the film itself, I think the trailer is great especially because of the inclusion of the song Pippin sings to Denethor in Return of the King, it gave me the chills seeing it in theaters. They also showed the new trailer for Interstellar (which I'm fucking excited for) which I'd also already seen, but this one also gave me the chills!

Everyone (still) reading this review is probably wondering what all this has to do with Guardians of the Galaxy, and to tell you the truth it has absolutely nothing to do with it, but I just felt like telling you guys anyway. So without further ado, I'll actually tell you what I thought about the movie that I'm reviewing. I was very skeptical about this one based on the trailers. It looked to me like it would continue the recent Marvel trend of stupid jokes every five seconds, most of which would fall flat. Thank god I was wrong! To be honest, the movie was actually pretty damn funny. Pretty much all of the jokes worked for me.

As for the cast, well they are awesome! The Guardians themselves kick ass! Chris Pratt was fantastic as the sarcastic Peter Quill, delivering some of the best lines and moments of the film. His character is the central focus of the story and I loved him. His personality was just great. Then we have Zoe Saldana who was fantastic as well. My question is, what color of person will she play next? She's blue in Avatar and green in this. Perhaps red. Dave Bautista was badass in his role of Drax and Vin Diesel shows his range by delivering the same line over and over again in different tones, which apparently means different things according to Rocket, which made for some nice funny moments. Speaking of Rocket, Bradley Cooper did awesome voice work for him and he along with Star Lord were my favorite characters. They provided most of the great humor.

One thing many people have mentioned is that the villains aren't that great. But to tell you the truth, most of the time they're not all that great in origin stories because the narrative has to focus more on the hero(es). One notable exception would be Ras al Ghul in Batman Begins, but that's mostly because Liam Neeson is just a badass. The villains weren't bad though (technically they were because they're villains, but you know what I mean). Lee Pace has a pretty cool voice, which makes his character cooler, but certainly not an elite villain like Loki or Magneto. I thought they did a really good job focusing on the Guardians and how they got together. Much like in The Avengers, the relationship between the heroes and the ups and downs of it was one of the finer aspects of the film.

The action scenes were very well done. They were exciting and well filmed. It's a hell of a lot easier to tell what's going on in the action scenes in this film than in Marvel's earlier film this year (The Winter Soldier) which was nice. The soundtrack (as was suggested in the trailer) was amazing! I especially loved the use of 'Hooked on a Feeling' even though they stole it from Reservoir Dogs. I enjoyed a lot of the pop culture references made throughout the film (mostly by Star Lord) and as I said before the humor was surprisingly good and very consistent. I don't have a whole lot to complain about with this movie. I went in a bit nervous and came out very satisfied. This was especially nice because of late I've become increasingly more sick of Superhero films. Guardians of the Galaxy was able to offer something fresh, humorous, and above all: fun. I'd love to see them do a crossover with The Avengers. 8/10

JC13 liked these reviews

All