Midsommar ★★★

If you don’t watch this sitting next to K.C. saying “OhMyGod” every time Christian says the dumbest thing a person can say to their partner of 4 years, then you haven’t really seen this. 

They’re told the children are watching “Austin Powers” when they first arrive, and all I could think was “Yes, please!”

I was so excited that William Jackson Harper (Chidi forever!) was cast in this and that he plays someone named Josh (!), and then left sad because he is completely wasted. 

Some great camera work overall and I appreciate the long takes where he just lets people act. (Spoiler...?) That shot of Florence (she just keeps on getting better with each role) in her huge flower dress, struggling to walk by the burning building was beautiful. 

Jack Reynor’s bloody dick (funny how many articles I’ve seen about him doing full frontal for like 5 seconds total, yet none about all the women that also did it during that scene too, for much longer) reminded me of David Duchovny in “Californication,” when he has period sex with Justine Bateman, and Ezra Miller, her son, sees his penis when he walks down the stairs, and asks “Did you hurt her?” 

Between this and The Death of Dick Long, A24 movies feature the best vaping Bros on screen this year. 

The assembly cut was close to 4 hours long, and even though he had final cut, Aster claims his preferred version is about 20 minutes longer. 

Hard pass.

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