“he was good, and you were both lucky to have found each other, because you too are good.”

“i think he was better than me.”

there’s something about this specific exchange and how mr. perlman’s reassurance is so vehemently deflected by elio’s self-deprecation that is so familiar it made my chest ache. it’s hard to embrace something or someone when we believe that we’re not enough, that we’re inadequate in some way, that we’re undeserving. instead, we so often bend the meaning of one’s presence (or absence) to fuel the mutinies in our head. 

i don’t know i feel like i’m rambling but i’m heartbroken and i loved this.