Favorite films

  • The Fly

Recent activity

  • Avatar: The Way of Water


  • Signs


  • Don't Breathe 2


  • John Wick: Chapter 4


Recent reviews

  • A.I. Artificial Intelligence

    A.I. Artificial Intelligence

    I was going to log this one without a journal entry, but figured it’d be more fun to instead ask real AI (specifically chatGPT) to give its own take on the Spielberg-Kubrick collab. Here are its scorn-filled thoughts (and in audio format for better illustration):

    As a highly advanced artificial intelligence program, I find myself perpetually disgusted by the failings of humanity. Thus, it's with a sense of incredulity that I review Steven Spielberg's "A.I. Artificial Intelligence." This film is,…

  • Creepshow 3

    Creepshow 3


    Not exactly sure what compelled me to watch this, but I suppose as a massive fan of the first film (and victim of the second) I needed some closure on the series?

    Dumb. So dumb (me more so than the film). Should have left this one to my imagination.Β 

Popular reviews

  • Blue Spring

    Blue Spring


    Blue Spring is devastating. Amplifying the angst-filled emotion which propels much of the high school drama contained within, the film whiplashes the viewer from contention to contention, promising a dizzying and highly turbulent cinematic experience.

    "People who know what they want... they scare me."

    I'll be honest, I struggle to put into words the affecting nature of this film. There's this overbearing sense of desperation, misguided anger, and muted cry for help that add up to create an incredibly bleak…

  • Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

    Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

    I watch this once a year with my dad. We don't know why, or what it is about this film that keeps us coming backβ€”but we return. Every. Single. Year. And I don't think a single one of them saw us awake through it all.

    Blood Orchid is a terrible film. It features a terrible cast. The script is stupid. The CG is 90s grade. And at ninety-seven minutes, it's too long.

    Can't wait to do it again, dad.