Favorite films

  • The Boy Friend
  • Kate Bush - Efteling Special
  • Fantasia
  • Neptune's Daughters

Recent activity

  • Pearl


  • La Nageuse

  • Garfield: His 9 Lives


  • Teddy at the Throttle


Pinned reviews

  • Deadly Weapons

    Deadly Weapons


    Thrust before (and between) the hefty greatness of Chesty Morgan, I am left mostly dumbstruck -- but, miracles deserve to be exalted, and thus I'll try my best to speak the unspeakable praises of Deadly Weapons, which was nothing short of a religious experience.

    Recently, I bought a fantastic birthday gift for myself: a turn-of-the-century postcard depicting a woman's face emerging from a seashell, replete with glued-on doll hair. After marveling over it for a while, I finally boiled down…

  • Home Stories

    Home Stories


    I've always been drawn to (fictional) unhinged women: as early as middle school, I first saw Sunset Boulevard and immediately began writing earnest poetry dedicated to the theatrical insanity of Norma Desmond; a poster of Sarah Bernhardt as a wild-eyed and murderous Medea was a centerpiece of my lovingly scrapbooked school binder. Later, I'd discover Blanche DuBois and become enraptured, as well as the relentlessly haunted Mary Henry of Carnival of Souls.

    It wasn't really until I (recently) hit my…

Recent reviews

  • Pearl



    The inevitable byproduct of melodrama: you can only thrust so many women into heartache and peril before someone gets seriously fucked up. Pearl, aspiring chorine and avid Theda Bara enjoyer, is one such victim — the ancient American archetype of the winsome farm girl who wants nothing more than to escape, to see bright lights that match the stars in her eyes. Pearl deserves it all, all of the Technicolor and sweeping strings, but she’s saddled with sickness, isolation, and…

  • La Nageuse

    La Nageuse

    Just gonna use this space to collectively review the early Reynaud loops: they're irresistibly charming, and kind of staggering in that they're animations far predating anything we typically consider to be an animated film. They're not films, of course, in the traditional sense, but watching them still gives the sense that you're seeing an 1870s cartoon, which is pretty mind-blowing.

Popular reviews

  • The Cabbage-Patch Fairy

    The Cabbage-Patch Fairy

    alice guy, walking into the hospital's room of newborns: lemme rent these

  • The Flying Train

    The Flying Train


    When I say my breath was taken away, I mean it -- and I can't imagine my reaction if I saw this properly projected in a theater.

    I'm a big fan (phan?) of phantom ride films, and this one has every ingredient needed to easily be the best I've seen: the 68mm film is crisp and fluid, the hanging railway is novel and gives an adventurous quality to the film, and there's so much scenery and life to see here. It's really amazing.