Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker ★★½

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This review may contain spoilers.

Extremely stupid in ways I didn't think possible and cements this series is for babies in a way George Lucas never believed. I never watched Endgame except skipping through some scenes and feel bad since that felt more genuine and relaxed. Feel like so much of the calling this the worst in the series is in part that Last Jedi allowed smarts to think it was okay to like the corporate machine again if it just had a little idiosyncrasy (even if it is very good at that). Honestly, all the ret-conning of every last detail (even the Jedi Texts being "important" to the plot!) was so brazen and thorough I found myself in awe alongside everything now being "all star destroyers are death stars!" and "btw leia's lightsaber is a thing that matters now!" it's all just truly exhausting, not to mention the few images that felt interesting when I left have all faded. None of the twists are dumb in their own right except everything literally has to be explained in ten seconds to get us to the next bullshit. Prequels innocent.

It only makes sense to alienate anyone who came on board there in a way that will hopefully drive everyone back toward watching Bruce Baillie and Christopher MacLaine shorts like George did in the 1960s.

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