Lady Bird

Lady Bird ★★★★★

the first time I watched this was the night before my high school graduation. after I was done I started SOBBING because all of lady bird’s emotions were mine. I felt her desire to be independent and saw myself and my mother’s relationship in her and her mother’s. especially at such a time in my life where the future held so many unknowns, it was very cathartic to watch a movie like this where I felt so perfectly represented!

this time I’m watching this at a different point in my life—in college at a time where my immediate future now seems very bleak—so while I still got everything from my previous viewing, I felt it was no longer my own. everything lady bird goes through, to me, was very quintessentially high school, and I, no longer being a high school student, was removed from her experiences. rather than living in her emotions, I felt I was viewing them as a part of my past.

this is the first coming of age movie I’ve rewatched since graduating, so I’m sure this will be a similar experience with other ones (how crazy to think I’ll be rewatching high school movies as a high school graduate!!) but also props to greta gerwig for making this hit every time. there is a certain universality to lady bird’s story, even though the physical experiences she goes through may not be as relatable, her emotions are something that’s felt by most teenage girls. I don’t think I’ve seen a movie that so perfectly captures what it feels like to be a high school girl—the yearning to show the world who you really are and the desire to feel fully understood, even though you know that everyone does understand because they’ve been through it before.

when I finished watching it this time around, I was also crying, but for a different reason: crying for what I have lost, but also gained, from high school, and the realization that it’s an experience I will never get back, and will never be matched by anything else I go through life. it was also a cathartic moment, but one of a very different kind. 

(side note: when lady bird says “I wish I could live through something”? I’m trying to imagine her in quarantine)

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