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  • Rorschach

    Rorschach

    ★½

    Two annoyed and annoying mediocre white men argue their way through dis/proving a haunting in a house with a handful of spooky elements in it, none of them ultimately tying into an overarching narrative or basic concept at all. This film hit every Paranormal Activity adjacent trope and there was no rhyme or reason, or payoff, to any of it. If you're going to make a low budge haunted house found footage movie, at least don't make it the same…

  • Between Worlds

    Between Worlds

    ★★★½

    This is not a thriller, this is a tongue-in-cheek comedy, and you owe it to yourself to see it

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  • Cats

    Cats

    ★★

    Drunk 11am Friday morning matinee. I went in knowing a lot, but here are some things I didn’t expect:

    - It is possible to be bored and overwhelmed at the same time
    - Chaotic 80s synthesizers
    - People complained it is too horny—I opine that it is not horny ENOUGH
    - Ian McKellen knew exactly what kind of train wreck he was getting himself into and played it as such
    - Jennifer Hudson’s relentless, devastating snot drip
    - Cats is truly a bad musical with bad songs
    - Unfortunately forced to confront that I would absolutely fukc The Magical Mr. Mistoffelees

  • Wildling

    Wildling

    ★½

    Men write, direct, and edit another movie about the pain of a young girl entering womanhood. Except the young girl entering womanhood is played by someone who is 26 years old, and womanhood means becoming a bigfoot. There were 16 producers on this film.

    There were about 20 seconds of really cool 80's throwback special effects, but nothing worth the time wasted watching this