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  • The Goldfinch

    The Goldfinch

    ★★★★★

    john moron crowley: theo is straight and in love with pippa
    ansel aneurin and ashleigh pooling money together for the fuck me pumps in their whatsapp gc: vibe check

  • The Goldfinch

    The Goldfinch

    ★★★★★

    DOES THIS DESERVE FIVE STARS? NO BUT I DONT CARE FOR YOUR RULES

  • It Chapter Two

    It Chapter Two

    ★★★★★

    yes i saw this movie three times in the span of four days no i will not be taking constructive criticism

  • It Chapter Two

    It Chapter Two

    ★★★★★

    andy mosquito: if richie’s canonically gay how are we gonna queerbait 
    andy bean & wyatt oleff pulling up their powerpoint on how to frame stanley uris takes a bath: oh you haven’t heard?

  • It Chapter Two

    It Chapter Two

    ★★★★★

    sometimes a cheesy objectively bad movie about facing and resolving your childhood trauma is something that can actually be so personal

  • Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood

    Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood

    ½

    the half a star was for making me laugh the whole last five minutes but like other than that i think i hate movies now

  • Good Boys

    Good Boys

    ★★★★

    at its core this movie was about two gay kids tryna get their straight friend a kiss from his crush also really fucked up that this has a lower rating than fucking once upon a time in hollywood anyway YOURE NOT RANDOM YOURE SPECIFIC................

  • Rocketman

    Rocketman

    ★★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    the pool/rocketman scene and the part where his younger self echoes the “when are you going to hug me?” line to his older self fucking HIT DIFFERENT the second time around at 1am. bernie saying it’s not weak to ask for help.....elton’s mom casually telling him he’ll never be loved properly.........elton metaphorically saying that what he needs to do now is forgive but he won’t let people talk down to him like that anymore.....how he keeps losing gaudy costume pieces…

  • Yesterday

    Yesterday

    ★★★

    the reviews for this movie are so SERIOUS im begging all of u to learn to have some FUN in yr lives this was ridiculous and not generically directed and i bet all u bitches laughed in the theatre when he searched up wonderwall

    p.s i do love the idea of taking the beatles’ fame away and giving it to a random indian man. that does indeed fuck

  • Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

    Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

    ★★★★★

    emma and i wrote this movie

  • My Own Private Idaho

    My Own Private Idaho

    ★★★★½

    - WELL, I— I DON’T KNOW. I MEAN— I MEAN, FOR ME....I COULD LOVE SOMEONE EVEN IF I.... YOU KNOW, WASNT PAID FOR IT. I LOVE YOU AND..... YOU DONT PAY ME
    - MIKE
    - I REALLY WANNA KISS YOU, MAN.

  • Y Tu Mamá También

    Y Tu Mamá También

    ★★★★½

    THE REPRESSION OF IT ALL ???????