Mansion of the Living Dead

Mansion of the Living Dead ★★★

There's like these monk guys or something and many, many years ago they burned a witch at the stake so she cursed them to worship satan and get all skull-y faced and they had to rape women as punishment for the women being of the "friendly" sort and as a sacrifice to good old Satan. These four chicks show up for a vacation and seem to really not like wearing clothing and are seemingly willing to sleep with anyone....except the creepy gardener guy....even each other. Then a bunch of stuff happens, one of the girls goes missing, another "girl" gets snatched and sacrificed, some lady is chained up naked in a bedroom without food, Lina Romay gets possessed maybe and kills her last (extremely hot) friend, and then kisses a guy that had peel-y skin all over his face, though at the hotel he looked normal, and then peels the icky skin off his face and he looks normal but then he dies and the other skull-y faced dudes walk to heaven I guess???

It's Jess Franco. He's more interested in naked ladies making out with each other and cramming his camera into their hoo haas, than in making a film that actually makes proper sense. I'm fine with that. There's still some pretty great shots and atmosphere and at times it can all be a little nightmarish. It's Jess Franco. It's a Franco film. Not one of his best but still really watchable if you're used to Franco.

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