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  • Guava Island

    Guava Island

    Save for the pleasant visual palette, full of rich, vibrant colors, hardly a single redeemable quality to be found: a miscast Donald Glover in the leading role (his performance is, somehow, even worse here than his turn as Young Lando in the Star Wars film no one watched last year), an unemotive Rihanna as his love interest, trite musical set-pieces (including a watered-down "This is America" rendition—an already terrible song made even worse), shallow social commentary (narrow-minded “class struggle” critiques—of…

  • L'Eclisse

    L'Eclisse

    ★★★★

    Rome fell once before, and now it falls again; but whereas the ancient Romans left behind coliseums and aqueducts—monuments of human greatness—we leave behind nothing worthwhile, except soulless modernist architecture and a ruined planet; at the end of the day, this is what Michelangelo Antonioni’s L’Eclisse is really about: the last gasp of the human-being, before his imminent extinction, before his replacement by cultureless, artless automotons, infected by parasitic materialism and obsessed with instant gratification, and the sterile modernist landscape we leave behind, after we’ve driven ourselves to ruin. Total darkness on Earth, an eternal eclipse.

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  • Avengers: Endgame

    Avengers: Endgame

    The greatest trick The Devil ever pulled: using the guise of the "moral high-ground" to shield himself from criticism. Right now, as we speak, Disney continues to get more and more powerful, with each passing day, usually through mischievous means, but because of its ability to flag wave towards Feminism, Afrocentrism, and Diversity—all calculated displays of “wokeness,” completely insincere in intention—the credulous among us, like the insufferable MovieBob, end up believing that this ruthless ever-expanding conglomerate is actually The Good…

  • Avengers: Endgame

    Avengers: Endgame

    Some time last year, I got into an argument with two family members over a trifling political matter; before the conclusion of this harmless debate, the younger family member looked me square in the eye and stated, with great conviction, "you are on the wrong side of history," perhaps in an attempt to have the final world, the prerequisite for any rhetorical victory. If uttered by someone with a modicum of political literacy (AKA someone not educated solely by the…