Matt!

Matt! Pro

Favorite films

  • The Train
  • Where Eagles Dare
  • The Guns of Navarone
  • Stalag 17

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  • Shock Waves

    ★★★

  • Dune: Part Two

    ★★★★★

  • The 'Burbs

    ★★★★

  • 47 Ronin

    ★★★

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  • Dune: Part Two

    Dune: Part Two

    ★★★★★

    Christopher Nolan owes Denis Villeneuve some serious head action for graciously delaying this movie till after Oppenheimer’s Oscar campaign had already locked up all the awards. Or, if not the sloppiest of toppies, then at the very least a nice Edible Arrangement or something, because this shit was off the absolute chizzle. Bewildering spectacle, unreal sound design, deeply thought-provoking messianic complexities, and enough giant sandworm battles to make Burt Gummer cream his cargo pants. Easily one of the most impressive…

  • The Iron Claw

    The Iron Claw

    ★★★★½

    Sometimes hardcore masculinity ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.

    Let’s be clear: being “the toughest, the strongest, the most successful, and the absolute best” is definitely akin to things I’ve heard (and often believed) my whole life, but it’s just a giant load of shit when you aren’t also taught to protect your body, your mind, your heart, and your soul equally. The Von Erich family is one of the most tragic stories to ever come out of professional…

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  • Shock Waves

    Shock Waves

    ★★★

    The movie that exists in my mind only as “that one with the underwater Nazi zombies”. Haunting imagery and eerie ambiance chosen over the standard rotting corpses and brain-eating gore. A spooky abandoned tropical island palace and a moody synth score. Peter Cushing. Brooke Adams. Thickly lain atmosphere out the ass. Dread builds and flourishes as the white sand beaches and statue-still forest paradise become more and more inescapable. Even ankle-high water could hold any number of low budget aquatic…

  • The 'Burbs

    The 'Burbs

    ★★★★

    “Art!! Your wife is home! And your house is on fire!!”
    “My WIFE is home?!?”

    Joe Dante just knew how to make fantastic feel-good thrillers, man. Suburban monotony morphing into eclectic paranoia, with characters that actually feel like kooky longtime neighbors and a spooky autumn vibe that makes you want to just sit at home in your pajamas and sip a cup o’ joe as you stare out the window ruminating over wild fantasies about what the hell that strange…

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  • Godzilla Minus One

    Godzilla Minus One

    ★★★★★

    Two films now in 2023 have dared to examine the fallout and societal implications of WWII’s nuclear exclamation point:

    1.  A hard-hitting social drama chronicling years in the life of a man broken and haunted by his own failure to prevent the darkness and devastation that enveloped the world following the introduction of the atomic bomb and the inadvertent opening of a door to an endless plague of hopelessness and destruction set upon future generations; a film which truly encapsulates…

  • Talk to Me

    Talk to Me

    ★★★★½

    Horror movies can be many things. They can be shocking. They can be campy. They can be spooky. They can have cheap scares. They can be “elevated”. They can be downright gross. But, while I love and cherish each one of those things, every now and then there comes a film that reminds you why the genre is actually called horror

    And this one right here rattled me to my fucking core.

    Its allegorical themes are nothing new—longing to escape…