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  • 1313: Haunted Frat

    1313: Haunted Frat

    ★★

    I cannot stop watching these movies. No matter what else I am doing these fucking 1313 movies haunt me. I feel intensely that I need to watch all of them even though they're exactly the same. They're hypnotizingly terrible. I can't look away from the screen even though nothing happens or the same scene is looped endlessly until I start to feel like I'm going insane. 

    Someone help me

  • Lorna, the Exorcist

    Lorna, the Exorcist

    ★★★½

    Film #37 of Shocktober17

    Lorna is the possessor. The "mysterious, irresistible, sorceress from a fantasy novel" Gorgeous, theatrical, dreamy and powerful. Lorna knows what she wants and she will get it, or ruin you trying to. Lorna and her electrifying blue eyeshadow; "this woman wants our destruction".

    Lorna is the mother who desires to be united with the now 18-year old Linda (played by Lina Romay). Lorna with soft orange and brown makeup, dressed in black lace. Visiting in the…

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  • Blood Harvest

    Blood Harvest

    ★★★★

    Blood Harvest is, of course, worth a watch for Tiny Tim’s performance alone - we open on his iconic vibrato-rich voice singing, fully-clad in outlandish clown makeup. He constantly looks on the verge of tears or a mental breakdown, he fidgets and twitches as he talks, he even prays in a church in his ridiculous clown outfit. He steals the entire show, naturally. 

    The good news is, I fully enjoyed the rest of this weirdo regional Wisconsin slasher as it’s…

  • Ice Cream Man

    Ice Cream Man

    ★★★

    "Do you realize how long it takes to make Butter Brickle?"

    A staple of late night movie marathons. I've seen this movie 4 times already and I'm thinking that may be one too many times as it's starting to lose its charm. It's definitely more suited to watching in a group.

    That being said, Clint Howard is the ultimate deranged lunatic, eye-ball scooping, "I use that to chop my nuts", happy happy happy, ice cream man. I watched the Monstervision…

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  • The Green Inferno

    The Green Inferno

    ★★★★

    I met Eli Roth.

    I just met Eli fucking Roth. Wow. Okay I don't know how much of this will be an actual review of the movie and how much will be me gushing over how sweet and amazing Eli is but bear with me. I won tickets to meet Eli and see a screening of this movie as part of Wizard World in Chicago. Unfortunately I didn't know that the reception was 21+ (that's because the contest I entered…

  • Cult of Chucky

    Cult of Chucky

    ★★★½

    Film #28 of Shocktober17

    I am so happy to say that Cult of Chucky is good fun. There's many familiar faces on display here, and Jennifer Tilly has a larger role in this movie than Curse (it's not huge, but she's in more than one scene!). They revive the character of Andy which was a nice touch as well.

    The majority of the movie is spent following Nica as she is dealing with her life in a mental hospital, following…