Put the mask on NOW (unless you're vaccinated)!
I want to murder a lighthouse wickie
And bury him next to me
I want to slaughter a lighthouse wickie
Right by the side of the sea
He'll polish his knob with a cry of glee
A scrimshaw mermaid on his knee
I want to butcher a lighthouse wickie
Won't that be okay?
We'll find a head in the old cistern
Drink turpentine by the shore
We'll invite the mighty Kraken in
And one-eyed seagulls by the score
♫...Hey kids let's go clear together
Dianetics taught us techniques that will wipe our minds forever.
We'll kill some Body Thetans tonight so stick around
You're gonna see H-bombs blow volcanos right off the ground
Say Johnny and L. Ron have you seen him yet?
Oh, but he's so spaced out
Xe-Xe-Xe-Xenu and the Clams
Oh, but he's weird and he's horrible
Oh, Xenu he's really mean
He's got e-metered boots
Wears a pressure suit
You know I read it…
My journey through the weird wild world of Beatsploitation has taken me to some pretty bizarre cinematic destinations, but "The Fat Black Pussycat" may well be the most outlandish.
This film lets you know right from the outset what you're in for as a naked brunette crawls into the framing shot of a seedy Greenwich Village alley and collapses, moaning...her moon-shaped derriere looming up into the camera as the credits roll just above her buttcheeks and the pounding crimejazz theme…
You are a fluke
Of the universe
You have no right to be here
Amid the noise and waste
And remember what comfort there may be
In owning a piece thereof
Avoid quiet and passive persons
Unless you are in need of sleep
Rotate your tires
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself
And heed well their advice
Even though they be turkeys
Know what to kiss and when
Consider that two wrongs never make a right
I get why this film resonates so much with a specific demographic of nostalgic old hippies, and aging baby-boomers who feel creatively stifled by their careers, but its central message of tuning in, turning on, and dropping out was a tad outdated even when it was originally released, and it certainly hasn't aged like a fine wine since.
But what really chaps my ass are the 1-dimensional strawmen authority figures that director Hal Ashby sets up as Harold's obstacles on…